nostalgia

When I was in High School, I distinctly remember days like today, where it had just rained really hard, the air was cold and crisp and the gray sky hung down low and threatening. These were my favorite days to cut class for one or two periods. I would sneak out to the parking lot, get into my little orange 914, roll down the windows and crank up that famous Volkswagen/cheap Porsche heater (windows were down because the defrost was broken) and take off to drive the back roads that stretched out beyond my rural woodsy high school campus. I'd usually sneak a cigarette, listen to music and think about how I was never going to be trapped by school or work or anything.

There was a particular quality of emotion connected to those days that I never experience as an adult, but I was reminded of it today as I had to leave school in the middle of everything to make the 50 minute round trip to get Emma's trumpet that she left behind this morning and desperately needed for class. I was listening to He War by Cat Power, and for some reason the rain soaked roads and the trees and the music brought it all back just a little, even though I didn't smoke a cigarette.

Sometimes I really miss being young and having my life open to anything, even as I do cherish my family, my friends and my job.